For sometime I believed confidence was being beautiful externally and knowing it. This misconception was was developed in my adolescence and filtered into my adulthood. As a Women with so many fights ahead of her, confidence seemed so far away and more of a luxury to have.
Eventually learning the full grasp of confidence, I realized I possessed none of it. In fact, you can say I had the opposite opinion of myself. I was not proud of who I saw, not happy for her accomplishments, not willing to push myself to the limits. Hearing every other day that you need to "Love Yourself More" and"Be Confident" applied so much pressure. So many women desire confidence that they are willing to do whatever for it. It saddens me to say I was apart of that statistic and some days still am.
Many woman I've studied were not always confident, and that's when it hit me. Confidence is not a luxury, it's a full time job to acquire. Like most jobs, you have to work hard to advance, or even be recognized. It helps when you enjoy the work you do, when you actually love it.
So how does that differ from being confident?
See, I was thinking confidence was all about external, but it's composed of internal as well. Feeling great about yourself is no easy fight. If you struggle with that today, please don't feel alone. This journey is necessary and will be appreciated eventually.
I want to encourage anyone battling with confidence to ask yourself the following:
What do you like about yourself?
What are you great at?
What have people encouraged you to do?
What would make you feel happier internally?
These questions are a great foundation to start "Loving Your Job" which is you. You are your job. Sometimes we won't like our jobs. Sometimes we will even sabotage it. It's with our faith, strength, loyalty to ourselves that we can transform that. We must be loyal to ourselves.
Confidence is a journey, and mines is far from over. I pray for that little girl who can't connect with being confident. Or that adult who wears a mask of confidence, but is far from self love. I pray they can be inspired and believe I more that surface value. There is a community of Women who need to be supported in this area. If you see one lacking, help them promote themselves at their job.
Brittney 'Genuine Gemini' Baker